"My style of worship.
My style of music.
My style of dress.
My style of haircut.
My style of Biblical translation.
My style of politics.
My style of religion.
I believe in Christ because he was just like me."
Wednesday, January 30, 2008
Tuesday, January 29, 2008
what's the problem?
-What's up?
I got this big problem in my life ... and I'm not really sure how to deal with it.
-Have you talked to talked to a Godly person about it?
No, it's none of their business.
-Have you prayerfully consulted Scripture?
No, I don't have time.
-Have you asked Christ to take total control of your life?
No, come on. I don't believe all that "Christ is Alive" stuff.
That's the problem.
I got this big problem in my life ... and I'm not really sure how to deal with it.
-Have you talked to talked to a Godly person about it?
No, it's none of their business.
-Have you prayerfully consulted Scripture?
No, I don't have time.
-Have you asked Christ to take total control of your life?
No, come on. I don't believe all that "Christ is Alive" stuff.
That's the problem.
Monday, January 28, 2008
Pilotage
1. Every takeoff is optional. Every landing is mandatory.
2. Flying isn't dangerous. Crashing is what's dangerous.
3. It's always better to be down here wishing you were up there than up there wishing you were down here.
4. The propeller is just a big fan to keep the pilot cool. When it stops, you can actually watch the pilot start sweating.
5. Learn from the mistakes of others. You won't live long enough to make all of them yourself.
6. Never let an aircraft take you somewhere your brain didn't get to five minutes earlier.
7. There are three simple rules for making a smooth landing. Unfortunately no one knows what they are.
8. You start with a bag full of luck and an empty bag of experience. The trick is to fill the bag of experience before you empty the bag of luck.
9. Good judgment comes from experience. Unfortunately, the experience usually comes from bad judgment.
10. Remember, gravity is not just a good idea. It's the law. And it's not subject to appeal.
2. Flying isn't dangerous. Crashing is what's dangerous.
3. It's always better to be down here wishing you were up there than up there wishing you were down here.
4. The propeller is just a big fan to keep the pilot cool. When it stops, you can actually watch the pilot start sweating.
5. Learn from the mistakes of others. You won't live long enough to make all of them yourself.
6. Never let an aircraft take you somewhere your brain didn't get to five minutes earlier.
7. There are three simple rules for making a smooth landing. Unfortunately no one knows what they are.
8. You start with a bag full of luck and an empty bag of experience. The trick is to fill the bag of experience before you empty the bag of luck.
9. Good judgment comes from experience. Unfortunately, the experience usually comes from bad judgment.
10. Remember, gravity is not just a good idea. It's the law. And it's not subject to appeal.
Sunday, January 27, 2008
Monkey Business
-from Tony Zappone at Wikipedia
"Early in 1964, Zappone was monitoring local police frequencies and overheard a Florida Highway Patrolman requesting a sergeant after he pulled over a chimpanzee driving a compact convertible for speeding on Interstate 4 just east of Tampa.
He rushed to grab a ride with another newsman and arrived in time to photograph the lawman issuing the chimp a citation for speeding and having no driver's license. Subsequently, charges against "Cappy" the chimp were dropped after a Hillsborough County judge ruled no infraction had occurred because at that time there was no requirement in Florida law that chimpanzees have licenses to drive.
Zappone was later commissioned by NBC Productions, Inc. to shoot film footage of Cappy driving around the Tampa area for later use on that network's The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson.
During the shoot, he was injured when the animal bit unrelentingly into his right hand during a stop at a downtown Tampa intersection and refused to let go until the light turned green 30 seconds later."
"Early in 1964, Zappone was monitoring local police frequencies and overheard a Florida Highway Patrolman requesting a sergeant after he pulled over a chimpanzee driving a compact convertible for speeding on Interstate 4 just east of Tampa.
He rushed to grab a ride with another newsman and arrived in time to photograph the lawman issuing the chimp a citation for speeding and having no driver's license. Subsequently, charges against "Cappy" the chimp were dropped after a Hillsborough County judge ruled no infraction had occurred because at that time there was no requirement in Florida law that chimpanzees have licenses to drive.
Zappone was later commissioned by NBC Productions, Inc. to shoot film footage of Cappy driving around the Tampa area for later use on that network's The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson.
During the shoot, he was injured when the animal bit unrelentingly into his right hand during a stop at a downtown Tampa intersection and refused to let go until the light turned green 30 seconds later."
Saturday, January 26, 2008
The funniest thing I heard all week
Fran was driving, we'd been trapped in the parking lot of some shopping center on Woodruff Road doing helpless circles for about 15 minutes trying to find an exit.
We were talking about the differences between flying and driving and I said, "Ya know with an auto-pilot, the only thing you really have to worry about is the landing."
Fran kinda shrugged and said, "Joe Hall I'm a sky diver ... so landings don't scare me."
We were talking about the differences between flying and driving and I said, "Ya know with an auto-pilot, the only thing you really have to worry about is the landing."
Fran kinda shrugged and said, "Joe Hall I'm a sky diver ... so landings don't scare me."
Singing Bulldogs, Crying Poodles
Walking across the Marina City parking lot tonight I spied a a big black pit bull sitting at the tailgate of the pickup truck parked beside me. As I strolled by my eyes locked in on his and I realized he'd seen me long before I'd spotted him.
Nothing happened, nothing at all.
That dog was a pure-T all-out 4-legged BAD MAN. But he seemed 100% bored, as if he was used to biting through engine blocks and outdrives in his spare time ... and yours truly didn't amount to much of a distraction.
The next SUV I passed had a blond cocker-poodle wearing a designer sweater lurking inside on the back seat: even though the windows were rolled up tight Mr. Poo lurched for me, enthusiastically launching at the window and resonating with rabid barks accompanied by a bright flashing of his pearly doggy-orthodontist maintained snappers.
The Poo was having a mood swing, and angrily let me know I didn't belong near his Blazer ... and announced that I'd probably wrinkled his new sweater just by walking past.
Somehow I think there was more than a thin glass window's worth of difference between them.
Nothing happened, nothing at all.
That dog was a pure-T all-out 4-legged BAD MAN. But he seemed 100% bored, as if he was used to biting through engine blocks and outdrives in his spare time ... and yours truly didn't amount to much of a distraction.
The next SUV I passed had a blond cocker-poodle wearing a designer sweater lurking inside on the back seat: even though the windows were rolled up tight Mr. Poo lurched for me, enthusiastically launching at the window and resonating with rabid barks accompanied by a bright flashing of his pearly doggy-orthodontist maintained snappers.
The Poo was having a mood swing, and angrily let me know I didn't belong near his Blazer ... and announced that I'd probably wrinkled his new sweater just by walking past.
Somehow I think there was more than a thin glass window's worth of difference between them.
HAVE YOU SEEN TODAY'S NEWS?!!!!
-from the "Headlines We'll Never See" Department:
God Caught Off-Guard:
Creator urges calm pending full investigation
God Caught Off-Guard:
Creator urges calm pending full investigation
a short list for Saturday
From where I live there's simply no easy way to get anywhere from here.
Like, it's a 70-mile round trip to get a haircut and a15-mile round trip to check my mail. So I don't do either one very often.
Thus, on the drive to the post office this morning I started counting how many churches I passed along the way ... but forgot about that when I tried memorizing the portable church signs instead.
Here's 4 I remember:
1. It Takes Dirt to Make A Mountain Out Of A Mole Hill
2. Some People Are Anxious to Serve God - As Advisers
3. Jesus Love You and So Do We*
4. Try Less Self Control and More God Control
* Earlier in the week this same sign read "God Loves Your $ And So Do We." I figure that one had to be a late-night practical joker's mischief, right?
Like, it's a 70-mile round trip to get a haircut and a15-mile round trip to check my mail. So I don't do either one very often.
Thus, on the drive to the post office this morning I started counting how many churches I passed along the way ... but forgot about that when I tried memorizing the portable church signs instead.
Here's 4 I remember:
1. It Takes Dirt to Make A Mountain Out Of A Mole Hill
2. Some People Are Anxious to Serve God - As Advisers
3. Jesus Love You and So Do We*
4. Try Less Self Control and More God Control
* Earlier in the week this same sign read "God Loves Your $ And So Do We." I figure that one had to be a late-night practical joker's mischief, right?
Friday, January 25, 2008
the king's clothes
There Will Be Blood.
Overlaying incongruent, sloppily directed scenes with atonal music = an absurdly poor excuse for film-making.
Overlaying incongruent, sloppily directed scenes with atonal music = an absurdly poor excuse for film-making.
Thursday, January 24, 2008
There Will Be Boredom
Just got back from seeing "There Will Be Blood" in Gville with Fran.
TWBB has received more stars at IMDB.com than either The Godfather, Citizen Kane, or The Godfather Part II so I was very anxious to see it.* Ok so I missed something.
Like, why they bothered.
Call me dense; now let's eat.
* check out all these awards.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
